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What you can expect:
The brutal truth of me, without all the sugary coating.
Here I am just me, UNCUT and UNEDITED.
I talk about my family, my divorce, and a lot about MAKEUP.
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Thursday, May 29, 2014

Max-isms Vol 1

Many people have commented on facebook (and in person) that they look forward to my posts of what Max says. Many people have said "you should write a book of what your kids say. I would buy it!" So I decided to start taking my Max posts from facebook and creating a Maxism series here on the blog. Enjoy today's Maxisms. 


Picture courtesy of Krista Miller, who caught on camera my son in his natural habitat.


Max never fails to ask if I'm wearing lipstick (or chapstick) before he will agree to kiss me. 
Tonight when I tried to give him a goodnight kiss, he asked again, "Are you wearing lipstick?" 
I admitted to wearing chapstick, so he kissed my forehead instead. 
Then he pointed to my forehead and said, "Now you have to have a bath right there. Oh, and I don't like the way it smells." lol (He was talking about the face cream I had just put on a few minutes earlier.) 
You always know where you stand with Max.

***

Max is screaming "EATING PEOPLE MAKES YOU FAT!" from the bathtub. Been going on a few minutes now. 
I finally went in to say, "Yes, I heard you! Eating people makes you fat! I heard. Now can we stop yelling?" 
Max, whispering: "Well talking makes you fat. You're getting fat right now." *huge grin* 
Lord help me with this child. smh.

***

Max: "I'm gonna eat some raisins!"
Me: "Those are actually craisins, because they are dried CRANberries instead of dried grapes."
Max: *makes a face* "CRANberries? Like... they are made of crayons? They color all over your mouth while you eat them?!" 
Me: "No, silly! Not CRAYONberries!" 
Max: *eats a few* "I like these crayon berries!" *Looks in mirror for crayon marks in his mouth*
 
A little while later, Max was reading the package of Craisins and said, "Craisins. Crai-sins. Wait, these are made of SINS?!" 

***


OK fine. I am willing to acknowledge the resemblance. (Me, 1987. Max, last week.)

Photo: OK fine. I am willing to acknowledge the resemblance. #Me #Max #minime To be continued..

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