What you can expect:
The brutal truth of me, without all the sugary coating.
Here I am just me, UNCUT and UNEDITED.
I talk about my family, my divorce, and a lot about MAKEUP.
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Thursday, May 26, 2011

School parent

Being the parent of a school-aged kid is still weird for me.
I avoid the school like the plague. I am not one of those PTA mothers who loves to "get involved." I would much prefer to not face a teacher this soon after high school graduation. (Don't you dare remind me that I graduated eight years ago. Just don't torture me like that.) 

I get these notes in their backpacks...
"Please sign and return," they say. I tend to look around to figure out who should sign them, until I realize it's supposed to be me.
"Sign up for the field trip," they say.
"Your son didn't turn in his homework," they say. Well of course he didn't! You were expecting ME to keep track of it! Just eight years ago I was explaining to my own teachers that this was an impossible feat... why would it be any different so soon?

I am so not mature enough to be the mom in this scenario. (Remember how moms were old??)

It also doesn't help that people always end up asking me things like, "Oh, are you Joshua's big sister?" or "Could you tell your mom to send some lunch money with Joshua tomorrow?" (Did you know I am in charge of writing lunch money checks?? It's just weird, I tell you!)
I have to give them the polite-but-irritated smile and say, "No, I'm Joshua's mom."
They start to think up something to say as their face goes red, and I say, "It's ok, I know. I don't look old enough to be anybody's mom."
I leave out the part that I had him my senior year in high school, and just let them wonder if I was eleven years old when I popped out a baby... or if maybe I am the much-too-young mistress who married his father and is now the wicked step-mom. As a result, they tend to walk away quickly and look very busy.
In their defense, most of them are on their seventh kid, so they are way on the other end of the school parent spectrum.

Yesterday my second son graduated from pre-school. I swear I was the proudest mama there. I still feel like an absolute poser when I stand in the crowd and try to play the "mom" part, but seriously... I made this kid! And he has successfully completed one entire school year without killing anyone, killing himself, getting killed, or driving a teacher to retirement. I'm so proud!

(That award is for being the most "hugglish"... a word Asher made up for when he needs an extra lot of hugs that day!)
  Somehow I am getting old and my babies are turning into people, and there's not a dang thing I can do about it. But it's so damn cute, I can't possibly complain. Life is good, even when I forget to notice.

Well, I'm off to another awards ceremony... this time for Joshua. He's finished with the second grade... which is fine, because second grade was still young, right? In less than three months, though, he'll be in third grade... which everyone knows is seriously old. :(  I guess I'd better take a lot of pictures!

Josh reading his book to the parents (it was dedicated to me!) with his teacher.

The whole family


  1. it really is so crazy to me that someone who is my age has 3 kids one of which is going to be a super-old 3rd grader! haha. no but seriously it is weird. especially the lunch money part... i still remember having to go get $2 from my mom each morning before school. TOO DANG WEIRD.

  2. It never stops being weird to me! Why can't my mind accept that I'm old now?


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